3 Things Every Christian Teenage Girl Should Know About Her Body:

WHAT I WOULD HAVE TOLD MY TEENAGE SELF

Getting braces, shaving legs, experiencing acne... what a pure delight the teen years are, right? 

Maybe you are living in it or remember it well or are experiencing it through the lens of a parent. Either way, it's clear that transitioning from little kid to teenager is NOT for the faint of heart.

Struggling with body image is certainly one of the obstacles most teens deal with at one point or another.

A 2015 research study on body image issues in adolescence found that:

I was no stranger to those statistics. My lovely in-between time is when I started to notice things.

The negative effects of media on teenage girls' body image have been researched and documented for years, and I was very familiar with those effects. Even though I didn't have Instagram or Netflix, I still managed to watch plenty of TV and read my fair share of SEVENTEEN magazine.

I noticed that all the popular girls on TV were very skinny... and always got the guys.

Aunt Becky & Uncle Jesse. Kelly Kapowski & Zach Morris. Rachel & Ross. Brittany & Justin.

The only ones I remember that weren't skinny were Roseanne and Miss Piggy. Which in turn made me notice that larger bodies were too often the punch line of jokes.

One time a boy in school told me a "yo mama" joke about my mom's body size. Granted, he didn't even know her or that she was quite thin. I guess my hormones were especially out of whack that day because I worked up the nerve and slapped him right after lunch! It wasn't my finest moment. Even back then I didn't like when people picked on others for their body size. I'm honestly one the least confrontational people you could ever meet so it's shocking that situation ever happened!

But back to my teenage observations...after noticing that skinny = popular and successful, I started to notice that maybe my thighs were a little too thick/squishy and my waist wasn't as small as my super-thin best friend's.

Though it felt awkward, my body was actually doing what it should have been.

In an article "Why you shouldn't worry about adolescent weight gain", Registered Dietitian, Bracha Kopstick, explains that weight gain is not only common but necessary. To support growing muscles, organs, bones, and the future ability to birth a baby, the female body must put on weight. Below summarizes a few physical changes that occur during this time.

FROM SOFTBALL TO POM POMS

Fortunately, despite my changing body, other things preoccupied my thoughts most of the time. I played softball and cared mostly about having fun with my friends, being fast, and not as scared of the ball! Then, as I got older and not much taller or better at throwing, my softball career ended when I didn't make the middle school team. I had dabbled in gymnastics and was often cartwheeling in the outfield anyway, so I made the full-on switch to cheerleading. Turned out I had way better spunk than aim! The middle school cheer team led to the high school team which led to packed weekends of ball games and competitions. Before I knew it, cheerleading engulfed the large majority of my free time.

I know, I know, cheerleading gets a bad rap... some of it justifiable. However, my high school cheer experience was not just about short skirts and mean girls. My teammates had determination and grit. We learned how to keep going with busted noses and braced-up ankles. We learned trust and how essential it was when throwing a human body in the air. And we learned how to be friends.

Nevertheless, I also learned that in cheerleading, skinny was optimal! If you were a flyer like my height forced me to be, you needed to be strong enough to compete AND light enough to be thrown in the air. I never quite felt there. I was more on the stocky side, especially compared to some of the college cheerleaders I looked up to who were about as big as an average-sized 8 yr old.

Isn't it funny how wherever you are in life, there's always going to be someone that looks or performs better? Teenagers have a keen sense of this phenomenon. The lie that "good isn't good enough" has a way of sneaking in, and it was one I became well-acquainted with.

BOYS & BILLY BLANKS

I'll never forget one time when a football player at school came up to me in a group of people and loudly proclaimed, "Daaang girl, you must be eating your cornbread and beans!" Maybe it was a compliment in his mind, but I wasn't a fan. I didn't really know him but apparently, his opinion highlighted my wavering security.

Sure, I was a Christian and knew all the right things. I knew Bible verses about beauty and self-worth. I'd done body image Bible studies, and I knew God loved me and my worth came from Him. Regardless, I wasn't quite sure how to get it from my head to my heart and out into my life. I was stuck between believing God and believing lies.

Was I really loveable, especially to boys, if I didn't look a certain way? 

I grew up in a neighborhood full of rough and tumble boys. I knew what was said about girls and observed which ones got the most attention. Sure, there was more to a relationship, but to get a guy to notice me, I felt the pressure to look a certain way and fit into the embarrassingly low-waisted jeans and way-too-short tops of the late 90's. Whoever started those fashion trends, thanks for nothing!

Because of parents and others that loved me well and poured truths into me, I wasn't unsatisfied enough with my body to diet. Besides, Mama cooked too well for me to not eat! Instead, I relied heavily on exercise. Cardio was king at the time, and I was a faithful servant. I did all the aerobics and of course Tae-bo! If you haven't seen Billy Blanks in a shiny blue leotard, were you really alive in the '90s? My friends and I probably knew all the moves by heart. Sometimes movement was enjoyable, but often it became an obligation or a way to redeem the brownies I ate the night before.

Looking back it's easy to see how the enemy was distracting me, but I wasn't the first to experience this. Humans have an insanely long history of falling for the lies.

THE HISTORY OF STRIVING

*Eve wanted more knowledge.

*Lot's wife wanted one more look back at her old life.

*Joseph's brothers wanted more attention from their father.

*Hannah wanted the love that her husband gave to her sister Rachel.

*Meanwhile Rachel just wanted all the babies that Hannah was having.

We all are born with a desire for more.

We're made in the image of a good God, and deep down we long for that same perfection.

The world convinces us that appearance and achievements get us pretty close. We want to look good, do good, and just be really good. Go to church, keep a job, and give to the community, all while looking like the latest Instagram influencer.

In their own way, the Jewish people of Jesus' time understood this pressure well. Sure, they didn't have social media to throw it in their faces, but they too had highly esteemed members of their society. Their measure of success focused largely on how well you could obey the Jewish law. The uber-religious thought they had this perfected.

And then Jesus came along.

If you were a Jewish citizen slaving away trying to live your best life, what would you want this amazing prophet and supposed Messiah you'd been hearing about to tell you?

Personally, if I encountered Jesus face to face, I'd want him to say, "You are doing such a great job! I saw you read your little devotional this morning and say a little prayer for that person you read about on Facebook! And, way to keep up with the laundry and homework and lunch boxes on top of it all! I am so proud of you."

Is there anyone else you'd rather hear an "atta-girl" from?

But that's not what Jesus did according to Matthew 5.

JESUS DROPS THE MIC

In the famous sermon on the Mount, Jesus holds nothing back. He tells the crowd of Jewish law-abiders that unless they could be more righteous than the most righteous people of their day (the religious leaders and teachers of the law) then they wouldn't enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

Ouch.

That'd be like someone saying, "unless you can't shoot basketball like Michael Jordan or Lebron James, then get off the court."

Then Jesus ups the ante even more.

He challenges them by expanding on their current set of rules with a series of "the law says... but I say..."

If he was speaking to us today, it might sound like: "Don't go patting yourself on the back for going to church on Sunday or not murdering someone or not cheating on your husband. I'm calling you to more! Don't even look at people on Instagram that make you think sexual thoughts. Or how about when someone cuts you off in traffic, don't call them an idiot! Love people...even those from the other political party. Give of your money AND your time, even when it's hard. And don't fight back if someone argues with you on Facebook!"

For us, and the people then, He delivered some heavy stuff.

The people He was speaking to already had quite the expansive list of laws to follow. I imagine they felt a little weary after hearing him tack on more commands.

And in their weariness, they probably were more aware than ever that they could never be good enough.

See, Jesus didn't tell them what they wanted to hear: "Way to go. Keep doing what you're doing."

Instead, he told them what they needed to hear.

He showed them their brokenness so they would realize their need to be repaired.

Just like the Jews that were wide-eyed and a little shocked, the message is extremely true for us today, especially for teenagers!

In fact, I wish I would've embraced that truth a long time ago.

I would've sat my teenage self down and said, "Take note!...

Here are 3 THINGS EVERY TEEN (and ADULT) SHOULD KNOW

It straight-up sucks sometimes. In some ways, it would be really nice to have a body that the world deemed perfect. But what happens in 30 years when that body sags and doesn't work like it used to? 

If we put our hope in our looks or actions, we will 100% of the time be met with disappointment.

Looks fade. Jobs ends. Humans sin.

The teenage years are the initiation into this staggering truth. Whether it's revealed through a terrible case of acne before prom night or a bad breakup with a first boyfriend, one way or another the messiness of life is revealed!

BUT THERE'S GOOD NEWS!

Unlike the people in the crowd Jesus was speaking to, we know the rest of the story. We know that Jesus only allows problems that He can solve.

He raised the standards for the Jews (and us) and He met them ALL.

He highlighted the void and filled it completely.

His perfection gives us permission to be imperfect.

With Jesus, "good enough" just doesn't work.

Unfortunately, like a toddler that has to touch the hot stove to learn a lesson, it takes us a little time to figure all of this out. We have to sift through the messy until we find what works!

Where do you see yourself trying to fill the void that only He can fill?

You can lay that burden down. Yes, keep doing your part, but rest in knowing that where you are weak, He is strong.